Sleep, My Darling, Sleep *
If I could but lay my lipsupon your tired eyelids,Id kiss away your wearinessand wish you into sleep.If I could gently place a kissupon your weary lips,Id breathe the breath of dreamsinto the pillow...
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Oh my goodness. Boy...do I know how you feel here. Tiptoeing around in my thoughts, huh? Loved it Jan. Serenity...Brandi"Your friend is your needs answered"- Kahlil Gibran
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It's a pleasant idea behind this, but the sense of interest is lacking I think.S1 is much the same as S2, just a different choice of words conveyingthe same meaning.If I could but lay my lipsupon your...
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I can't critique this, Jan, but I'd just like to say this is very nice:"If I could only hold you,lay your shoulders to my breast,Id ease away your tensionsand lay you down to rest."Here, I picture a...
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I think this is just beautiful - well done . I did spot the breath instead of breathe - so well spotted Matt! Other than that I like it just as it is. Jean's Poems
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this poem brought tears ....and to think that I'm an old cynicjan oskar hansen
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Brandi, thanks. I had a feeling you would relate to this one. Matt, thanks so much for the crit. You have actually re-affirmed my own thoughts. The feel of the poem was intended to be calm, even...
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